Once, I had a bad hair day and didn’t think it was fair to let my colleagues see the untamed chaos of my dark afro. So, I spent Wednesday night rummaging through my closet for a solution. Hidden in a corner was a transparent red wig bag. “There you are!” I muttered, unexcited. I didn’t love the idea since I sweat under it, but I put it on anyway.

 

Distasteful! Without some flat cornrows, I might as well paint my face and complete the clown look. So, I kept searching.

 

“VOILA!” I found a sea-green velvety hair wrap that fit perfectly. Paired with a dark trouser suit and matching blouse, I was already anticipating compliments.

 

Thursday morning arrived, and I was brimming with enthusiasm. Work went smoothly, and my confidence soared, especially because I believed I looked STUNNING! Then, just before the end of the day, my phone rang. It was an HR colleague seeking clarification on some jargon. Afterwards, we chatted casually, both of us feeling the weight of hectic workdays.

 

“I don’t have a life anymore! How will I ever find a husband at this pace?” she joked. We both laughed, keeping it quiet to avoid getting caught off guard. I mentioned how busy I’d been and how I barely had time to fix my hair. That’s when the conversation took an unexpected turn.

 

Her: “So, what did you do to your hair?”

Me: “I’m wearing a head wrap. I look great, and the compliments have been nonstop! I’m even thinking of making it my signature style.”

Her: “Head-wrap? To the office? Isn’t that against the dress code?”

Me: “Dress code? I didn’t get the memo that head-wraps are inappropriate.”

Her: “Come on, Madam HR, you know that’s not professional. What kind of example are you setting?”

Me: “Why not? I haven’t seen any rule that says I can’t wear a fitted head-wrap. What about inclusivity for those who dress this way for religious reasons?”

Her: “That’s different. You’re not one of them.”

Me: “How can you be sure? And even if I’m not, would it matter if I’m doing my job just as well?”

Her: “Don’t use your position to bend the rules. Some things aren’t written, but they’re understood.”

 

The conversation went back and forth until we finally dropped it to focus on work. But I couldn’t shake it. That chat left me thinking: how often do we let unspoken and outdated rules control our actions, yet we rarely stop to ask, “WHY?”

 

Why not?
Why so?
Why this?
Why that?

 

It reminds me of the proverbial monkey story. Read more here: Monkey Story.

 MORAL ADVICE: If you’re ever deciding what to DO or NOT DO, or who to BECOME, make sure you know and understand the narratives in circulation. More importantly,

  • Recognise the Reality,
  • Discover your Truth,
  • Define your Narrative,
  • Work toward your Aspirations,
  • Never give up until you WIN,
  • And commit to finishing STRONG.

 

Get SPOT-Me to start and support your journey and consider taking the SELF-REENGINEERING COURSE.

 

Cheers,

StephREDD

 

1 Comment
  • Gena Lavish

    Reply

    1 June 2021 at 7:25 PM

    Wow wow wow!!!

    Premium pieces!!!
    I read three. I’ll be back for more.

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